Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Thursday.

Thursday.  Also known as the day after tomorrow.  Thursday will be the first time I get to speak in public since college.  In some ways, I don't feel ready, but I already know God has called me to this time, so I fully expect Him to show up and calm my nerves, fully equipping me before then.  A few years ago I felt like God was calling me to teach and to write this book- to be entitled NO LONGER I.  I don't know why I felt like He wanted me to write- I mean, I have to use spelling (and grammar) checks to send an e-mail- but none-the-less, I have pressed on.  I have written in and out of seasons- both good and bad; taking breaks for babies, big kids, the Hottie, and just life in general.  I've had many ideas- some good... many not-so-good.

Through it all, I've watched God transform my thought life, almost completely.  He's no where close to being done with me, but compared to who I once was, I'd say "We've come a long way, baby!"  I'm still wildly flawed and I still feel unusable, but The Lord is working in my life and I can't wait to see where I am at the end of this next season.  

In the mean time, I'd simply like to ask for your prayers.  Last night I started feeling pretty sick and this morning it was still hanging around.  (No people, I'm absolutely 100% NOT pregnant).  It's not that kind of sick.  It's more like a cold or bronchitis- something of the like.  But none-the-less, I have very little voice.  I, personally, would be okay with laying in bed all week, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has other plans, so please pray that whatever this is would be gone- along with my nerves and feelings of doubt.  

Half of me is super giddy- like a kid on Christmas morning.  The other half of me is fighting off the lies that the enemy keeps telling me like: "You're not ready."  "This won't be any good- don't waste your time."  "No one's going to show up- this is a joke.", and "You're not funny or knowledgeable enough."  But I know in my heart that God has given me a word to share and that's exactly what I'm claiming.  So I'm standing in His name, declaring that those lies have no place here and that I will be healed in time for Thursday morning.  

Thanks for praying (and for your continued support)!  

No longer believing the lies, 

No longer I,

The Real Life Mom.

1 comment:

Amanda said...

Praying for you, Christi! You'll do great. I wish I could come to your Bible study but Thursdays are when I have MOPS (mother of preschoolers) group. I'll be thinking about you and hope you feel better soon.