Friday, October 17, 2008

4 women... 2 hours... 1 amazing God.

So last night we had the first official women's prayer night. It wasn't a time for fellowship. It wasn't a time for getting to know others or for mingling. This was a time where we planned to join together in prayer for a time to petition God on behalf of our nation, our church, our families, and our friends. There were only four of us, but in retrospect, there were FOUR of us!!! Praise God! What I thought would last thirty minutes ended up lasting nearly two hours! I have NEVER prayed for nearly two hours before. I just don't normally focus well enough to be able to. But last night was so sweet, so precious. There were times that were more emotional than others, but it was absolutely perfect! I was a little intimidated because I am not normally comfortable praying aloud (for fear, I guess, of sounding stupid). But last night we all prayed out loud, and I know God was there. It was beautiful. It was amazing and I cannot wait to do it again. It shall be titled: 3rd Thursday. So next month, 3rd Thursday, see you there. :)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Overwhelmed...

So I have a grandmother that is going through the "fun times" of dimensia. She literally has probably only 20% of her day where she is lucid (meaning where she actually knows what is going on). I called her a while ago and she had no idea who I was and then asked me if I was coming to the funeral (referring to her own funeral). I told her I would come and she said, in a happy sort of way, "Okay good honey, well I'll see you then. Love you!" And then she hung up the phone. I wonder who suffers more when a family member goes through dimensia. Is it the person who is ill- do they really duffer? I mean half the time they are in their favorite places with their favorite people- so are they really sufferring or is it the family? We are all selfish and want to keep her with us here on earth- all the while hurting deeply because this person on the other end of the phone is no longer my grandmother- this is some child that barely knows who I am and always tells me her granddaughter is on the way to visit.

Talk about difficult. On top of this, I have a special needs child- and we are not exactly sure what his special need is, or if it's just a combination of things, but whatever it is, it's getting more and more frustrating to be his mom.... sometimes. Other times I am filled with this overwhelming love and affection and adoration for this precious, hillarious creature that God has blessed me with.

My mind is a whirlwind of emotions, thoughts, feelings. Perhaps I am hormonal or perhaps I am just not doing very well with the whole surrendering thing. All I know is I am overwhelmed- and what I mentioned here doesn't even scratch the surface of what is going on in my mind. What a day... I am going to run.

Prayer Nights...

So I am starting a prayer night. I am NOT comfortable praying in front of others outloud... so I am starting a prayer night. Actually, I have been feeling this overwhelming feeling of a community-wide spiritual attack. I have felt it in our family and have seen it affect the lives of so many to the point where I realized we can no longr just sit back and watch it happen- we have to fight back. I am not sure how many people will come the first night (Thursday) or how long it will last. All I know for sure is there will at least be three of us and probably lots of uncomfortable silence as we approach the throne of God on behalf of our families, our community, our nation, and our world.

So keep me in your prayers. Keep Thursday in your prayers and if you can't be there to pray with us, join us in spirit. I cannot wait to see what happens when we pray and when God's power is unleashed. Thank you.