Then as I sat back and watched my friend settle comfortably into nursing her child, I looked over at my eight year old angel and like a brick wall, I realized I now have less than ten years with this angel in my home... unless she's a mooch and decides that she wants to live with us forever. Somehow I don't see that happening, so I think I'm looking at less than ten years with her.
What the heck?!?! Where did the time go? I feel like the wind just got knocked out of my sail. I mean, I spent so much time waiting for her to grow up and teaching her, guiding her, arguing with her, laughing with her, but in reality, what did I DO with that time? Has it made a difference? I mean, have I wasted these first eight years, or have I honored God with the time I've spent?
Since the invention of Facebook, I know for certain I have wasted an insane amount of time... doing nothing. I'm not sure what the pull is to Facebook, but for some reason, I can waste more time trying to come up with the next most entertaining status or trying to find out other people's business than I do focusing on my own business. Somehow I have lost my way- lost my priorities. Facebook isn't the only culprit. I often find my days have been occupied with so many other seemingly important things like housework or errands or other "important" tasks.
I read this quote on my friend's Facebook Wall the other day and it made me think: "I really am your gift. I am not just a little person who needs to be "raised" and taught, and taken to activities....I came to the people in my life to bring a message: slow down. Feel. Be. Over and over again. When you do, you will notice immediately, that I am not an obstacle to your work, or inconvenience to your daily life. Instead, you will come to appreciate my honesty, humor, presence and love."-- Bruce Scott
I had several thought trains after reading this. My First thought was- wow. They really are my gifts. I know I sometimes take them for granted. I have spent so much time wishing their lives away that I have completely missed out on what's been right in front of me for years. It started when they were babies. I couldn't wait until they could sit up- then I couldn't wait until they could crawl- then walk- then talk... and pretty soon they weren't little babies any more. They were toddlers. Then I couldn't wait until they were older so they were more mature. Then they got older and I wanted them to stop growing. It's too bad I can't keep them young forever...