Here's To The Man...

Here's To The Man...

And so I thought to myself the other day, as my husband hugged me...

"Here's to the man who saw me when I weighed 307 pounds (with no baby inside) and hugged me the same as he does now.  

HERE'S TO THE MAN WHO LOOKED AT ME, LONGINGLY, WHEN I WAS A SLOTHFUL, GLUTTONOUS WOMAN, AND TREATED ME LIKE HIS QUEEN. 

 Here's to the man who never once made me feel like an object of lust, but, rather, THE object of his affections- no matter my size.

Here's to the man who saw me at 145, pursued me passionately, and never stopped, even when I was at my worst. 

Here's to the man who stood by my side through each and every "diet" I attempted... and ultimately failed.  

Here's to the man who took his vows seriously- especially that one about loving and cherishing...  in sickness and in health.

Here's to the man who gained weight when I got pregnant and called it his "sympathy belly" just to make me feel better... and maybe to comfort himself a little, as well.  

Here's to the man who has been my biggest cheerleader and never once, not one time in eleven years, made me feel ugly, fat, unlikable, unlovable, unworthy of his affections and efforts.  

Here's to the man who didn't turn to pornography or other women when I was "morbidly obese"- but instead, comforted and encouraged me... and never once gave up on me.  

Here's to the man who gets publicly pursued by aggressive women... frequently...  in front of his overweight wife, and chooses to publicly affirm the woman he married, rather than acknowledging the inconsiderate women vying for his attention.  

Here's to the first man to ever make me feel truly beautiful, and to love me for WHO I AM, not what I look like, or what I can do for him.

Here's to the man who saw me push him away in my brokenness and shame, and refused to give up on me.

Here's to the man who consistently brings out the best in me...

And here's to the man who saw a broken woman, ashamed of who she had become, and picked her up out of her insecurities and her depression, and carried her until she was strong enough to walk on her own.

To that man, I owe my love and my life.  He demonstrated the perfect picture of how a husband should love a wife.  He is the perfect example of God's heart for me."

You Can Learn A Lot From A Toddler

I don't think I ever realized how much I could learn from my children...

And then they got sick.

And I was (am) a zombie.

Because I have barely slept, my brain can't function at capacity- which means that instead of my normal 3684763546354368 thoughts at a time, it's pretty much just the one... or three.  It's much quieter in there, I must admit.

And as such, I have been able to notice some things that might otherwise go unnoticed in my typical hurrying and busyness.

All of my observations have led me to this- you can learn a great deal from a toddler... if you pay attention.

Cue Shepherd.

Shepherd is the baby- my baby and has this way of really melting my heart with just the one look.  Seriously- look at that face.

But Shepherd, unknowingly, opened my eyes this past week.  When he wasn't feeling well, all he wanted was to be held by mommy and daddy.

He didn't want snacks, entertainment, or even his siblings.  All he wanted was to be held.

And in considering this, I realized how many times I have been in the midst of a situation, and what I NEED is to be held by my creator, allowing Him to bring comfort and healing.  But instead of falling on the cross and allowing Jesus to hold me, I often turn to food, to friends, or to Facebook for comfort.  It's not my first instinct to go straight to Jesus and pour out my heart to Him, allowing Him to hold me while I "get better"... but oh, how I wish I was more like Shepherd in this- completely dependent on mom and dad, un-tainted by the internet and the "independence" modeled by the world around us.

Seriously...  I wish I was like Shepherd in many ways.  I wish I ran to my daddy for healing, for comfort, for rest...  but it's far too often that I have become independent and managed to try to forge my own way.  I see now why Jesus emphasized our need to become like little children.

I mean, have you ever watched a toddler who is being carried by mom or dad?  When picked up, Shepherd instinctively trusts that we will carry him and not let him fall.

I wonder how many times I've run to God and asked Him to carry me, but all the while, I worry about falling, and consequently, I wrestle my way out of His arms...

Think about it.  Your kids can teach you so, so much about who you are, and who you can be...  pay attention and be blessed!

Just my thoughts for today.  I learned much, much more during our week with the flu, but I'm still recovering from a lack of sleep, so I'll keep it brief before this train of thought derails for the evening, resulting in a series of unfortunate rabbit trails.

Growing through parenthood,

The Real Life Mom

HERE'S TO 2013!

Worthless.

It's all worthless, and a waste of time.  All of it.

Status.  Power.  Money.  Fame.  Popularity.  Looks.  Strength.

Worthless.  All of it.

I wrote about it before, but I don't think I ever fully grasped it...  I don't even know that I fully grasp it now.

My husband and I started reading this book together last night.  I've started it before, but my heart wasn't in the right place, so I didn't really grab hold of the message.

The book is called CRAZY LOVE.  The author is Francis Chan.  Here is the Amazon link. Pick up a copy if you can.

The first chapter sends you to the internet to watch a couple of videos, in addition to an in depth writing from Mr. Chan.  I was okay kind of doing my own thing, checking my Facebook several times a day (looking for approval- even though I know better).

And then I watched this.  CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE FIRST VIDEO. IT'S SHORT. DON'T WORRY.

That one is called "The Awe Factor".  And it literally took my breath away.

Then we read a little more and we were instructed to go to this video: CLICK HERE WHEN YOU HAVE 15 MINUTES TO WATCH. BUT DON'T FORGET TO WATCH IT!

I've heard the "bigness", the "vastness" of God explained before, but I never got it, like really thought I could wrap my mind around even a small portion of who God really is.  Not that my pea-sized brain will ever fully comprehend all of God.  I mean, even the angels, who have access to see Him, have to cover their faces in response to His awesomeness.

And although you might think I'm part angel...  I'm so not.  I'm just me.

I'm not part of some big bang.  I'm not an accident.

Psalm 139 says

"O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.  You know when I sit down or stand up.  You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.  You see me when I travel and when I rest at home.  You know everything I do.  You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.  You go before me and follow me.  You place your hand of blessing on my head.   Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,  too great for me to understand!  I can never escape from your Spirit!  I can never get away from your presence!  If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.  If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.  I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—  but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.  To you the night shines as bright as day.  Darkness and light are the same to you.  You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.  Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!  Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book!  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.  How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.  They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand!  And when I wake up, you are still with me!"

Yeah...  I'm still kind of stuck on the AWE FACTOR video...  and then I think about Psalm 139- How awesome God is, and then that phenomenal, awesome, beautiful, amazing, extravagant, tremendous God that created all of the billions of galaxies...  that same God loves you.  And He loves me.  Not "loves" as in "She really loves Chick-fil-A", but as in "There aren't enough words to describe the love He has for us!"  He watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion... He knew every word I would say before I said it.  He knew I would make mistakes and let people down.  He knew all of my bad choices, and my good choices- before I even made them.

And He loved me any way.

In the same way that He loved Peter, who ultimately betrayed Him, and then went on to lead a tremendous life that brought honor and glory to His name.  He loves us.  And He wants us to know Him- to have a relationship with Him.

Not just reading our Bibles and rushing through some prayer time...  but really learning about who He is, and loving Him in response to His awesomeness.

And part of learning to love Him as an overflow of the joy you feel deep inside, is learning to trust Him.

This morning when I woke up, I had some worries and concerns.

And then I remembered the AWE FACTOR and I was reminded that He controls all of those billions of galaxies.  He keeps the Earth spinning at the perfect rate.  He keeps all of the stars and the sun and the other planets from flying off in to orbit.  He is also in the minuscule details- like in our cell structure and our physical make up.  If He controls and cares about even the smallest details about you, regardless of what you have done, don't you imagine that He cares about the things that concern you?  And if He can control all of those things, doesn't it make sense to ask Him to be in control of the things that seem out of control?  Doesn't it make sense to trust Him in the things that seem tremendous, and impossible to us?  I mean, after all, He controls billions of galaxies and their perfect timing, and everything else that is required to sustain the universe, so your problems, and my problems are probably in good hands.

! Peter 5:7 says

" Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you."

Yes, He does.

So I won't waste any more time worrying about things I cannot control.   Remember the Puzzle Pieces we talked about a while back? 

He is in control- from the smallest details and concerns, the the most incomprehensible.  I never stopped to worry about what would happen if our Earth spun out of control...  because I never thought to.  I naturally trusted that God made it, so He would take care of it.

In the same way, I think He's trying to show us that He made us, so He will take care of us.

Remember- He saw all of the days of our lives before we were ever even a glimmer in the eyes of our parents.  He knew we would struggle.  He knew we would doubt.  He knew we would wrestle to be in control.  He knew we would suffer.  He knew we would experience unfathomable pain during our lives.  He knew we'd fall...  even when we fell hard.  He knew we'd waste time- even though we don't have tons of it.  He knew we'd waste our talents and our gifts- and He still chose to give them to us.  He knew we'd made a mockery of Christianity and of the way He wants the church to be.  He knew we'd all be in and of the world at some point...

And still, He loved us.  

His love isn't dependent on our performance.  He doesn't function like humans.  His love was perfect before we ever made any choices- good or bad, so how could we ever make Him love us more or less by making the choices He already knew we were going to make?!?

The answer is...  we can't.

So stop trying.

Like I said- all of this time and effort we are pouring in to status, fame, popularity, money, looks, strength, it's all worthless in comparison to what He has planned for us.

So if I could say anything this New Year, it would be this- don't waste it.

Brad Paisley said, of New Year's Day "Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book.  Write a good one."

And to that, I would say- today is the second page of a 365 page book.  Only 363 pages left.

What choices will you make this year?  Will you spend countless hours working and striving for things that don't matter?  Will the pages of your book 2013 all be the same "Woke up.  Brushed teeth.   Fed family.    Worried.  Cleaned. Worried.  Fed family.  Worried.  Cleaned.  Worried.  Facebooked in search of validation.  Blogged and ignored my kids.  Fed family.  Cleaned.  Facebooked again for more validation.  Bathed.  Brushed teeth.  Went to bed."

Or will you, perhaps, let the author of all authors lead you as you seek to write things you've never even dreamed of before?  Will you meet with Him and let Him really show you the greatness of His love for you, and His beautiful, perfect plan for your life?

I'm pretty sure THAT would be a real page-turner.  Just sayin'.

Happy New Year friends!   I pray that this year is the year God does a new thing in and through you.  I pray that He fills you to overflowing with tremendous joy and passion.  I pray He covers you with His love and that your life, and my life become reflections of His glory, and His planned lived out.

Looking forward to this new year, this new book.  Looking forward, also, to writing shorter blogs.... after this one.  ;)  (It's a resolution- less is more.)

God bless you, friends.

Happy New Year!

No Longer I,

The Real Life Mom.

My Ministry Affair

Okay, so I may or may not be a control freak.  Maybe...  just a little.

I had all of these ideas and plans about the way things should be in my life (as if it were, truly, MY life.)

For a while, I had things my way.  I was singing every week, or every other week on our praise team at church.  I was teaching women's Bible study.  I was leading the youth and helping out with children's and women's and every other ministry that I felt compelled to be a part of.  If there was an event at church, I was there.  If there was an opportunity for me to get involved, I was first on the sign up list.

Like I said, I'm a control freak.

I thought that I was becoming more "righteous" by helping out, but in reality, I was becoming more self-righteous.  I had everything I wanted.  In fact, because of my need for man's approval, and for control, I would pile on task, after task, after task just so that I could hear what an awesome job I was doing.  (Just being real here, folks- don't judge.)

So obviously I didn't know that's what I was doing.  My children, my marriage, and my relationship with God all took a back seat to my participation in ministry.  In fact, ministry became my idol, and essentially my love.  I turned every bit of my spare attention to ministry and to pursuing a career in ministry and, ironically, I left God completely out of the equation.

When my whole world seemed to crumble, I looked back and realized that I had been having an affair.  As a friend once put it "my affair was with ministry."  It was never with a person, but always with ministry- and honestly, I'm not sure which is worse.  If my affair had been with a person, I would have been able to break it off and hopefully reconcile with my husband and with God.  Instead, I was so blinded by "good deeds" and "serving" that I couldn't even begin to see where I was wrong.

I love that last part- verse 7 where he says "Be not wise in your own eyes; reverently fear and worship the Lord." 

When I had things my way, when I was in control, I was wise in my own eyes and

I had no need for God.

I found every bit of my value in affirmation and attention, thus my "value" was based on performance and the ability to attain perfection.  That could be another reason why He said not to lean on our own understanding...  just a thought.

But after a while of doing things my way, God humbled me.

Through some very necessary changes at our church, I wasn't able to participate and perform at the level I once had.  So naturally, my self-worth, my value completely diminished.  Unknowingly, I had been living out entire parts of my life according to my own selfish ambition and vain conceit and when the opportunities simply were not available to me any longer, my wants, my desires, my hopes, my dreams, my plans all seemed to decrease while my need for God gradually increased.

Once I was "nothing" in my eyes, I was finally able to see God clearly.  It's funny how that works.  When I was desperate for love, for affirmation, and for attention, I had no where else to turn, but to God.  He began to show me that my pursuit of status had left my husband and my children feeling empty and unloved- and had left me completely drained and exhausted- not at all His plan for me.  So through a season of learning to pray and surrender to Him, my marriage was completely restored, and my children rejuvenated.  Our lives were completely changed, for His glory.

He showed me my need wasn't for status, or fulfillment in ministry, the perfect family, or the perfect job.  My need all along, was for Him.

So I get it when James says

"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.  So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing." James 1:2-4

You see, I needed God, but I didn't know I needed Him.  My heart longed for intimacy with Him, and unknowingly, I looked in all of the wrong places to try to find what I thought I was looking for.  During this time, I flirted with bitterness, but thankfully God revealed His desires for me to focus on my family and on Him rather than on what I thought I should be doing and He broke down the half-built walls of bitterness.  Once I was finally able to recognize my need for Him, my prayers became more real, my dependence on Him grew, and my independence shrank.  I started looking to Him to meet all of my needs and I noticed that I wasn't so "thirsty", so desperate for status, for ministry opportunities, for attention and the approval of man.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm thankful for these trials and for a forgiving family.  I'm thankful that God used the past couple of years to radically transform who I was for His glory, and I praise Him for the opportunity to have endured this and to have come out on the other side closer to my husband and children than ever before.

Not that I'd opt to go through all of this again...  because either it was more difficult than it had to be, or I'm just a really slow (stubborn) learner... or both.

Always learning, for His glory.

No longer I,

The Real Life Mom

Our Free Car, Our Christmas Miracle

So we got this car the other day...

Actually, let me re-phrase that:  we were GIVEN a car the other day- free of charge, as in "Here is the title.  It's all yours."

I know...  crazy, right?

It's beyond amazing.  It's fully loaded and better than anything either one of us could ever have hoped for or imagined.  It's gorgeous and wonderful and, almost too good to be true.

Only it's really true.  This really did happen.

Now- to answer your questions:

No.  We don't know who.  We don't know how.  We don't know why.

All we know is that we have been praying for quite some time for a vehicle- a vehicle without a car note.  I know- it seems crazy to pray for something like that, but we've been blessed in the past, and so I figured- why put God in a box?

Luke 1:37 says "NOTHING is impossible with God."

I wasn't sure what that would entail- whether it would be something we would save for over a long period of time,or if God would just show up and provide for this need.  Either way, I knew something needed to happen... something beyond our means, so we prayed.

The kids and I had made a prayer poster with a list of requests- super requests- things that only God could do.  I wanted them to see evidence of God at work.  As we prayed for these requests, some of them were answered- but definitely not in the ways I would have imagined.  God is a creative God, and I like to think of Him as being a romantic.  In all of His beautiful creativity, He reached down in to our circumstances and, for whatever reason, He chose to bless us in some pretty mind-blowing ways.

When it came to the request for the car, however, I began to get discouraged.  I started to try to "fix" the problem.  I began looking on Craigslist for a vehicle.  I thought perhaps I should just buy my husband a "clunker"- something to get him to and from work, and nothing more.  I looked everywhere, but no one seemed to be willing to negotiate down to a price we could manage- and the people who seemed most willing to make a deal were almost all scams.

So I allowed myself to buy in to Satan's lie that I should just give up.

But I had been so convinced that we were supposed to pray for a vehicle without a car note.  So why was I giving up?

Because waiting on God didn't fit in to my timeline.

And then something inside of me changed.  During a quiet time, in Romans 8, I read:

"If we look forward to something we don't have yet, we must wait patiently and confidently." 

After reading this, I was reminded that I needed to continue to wait on God, on His timing, and wait confidently- not giving up.  I tried.  I prayed.  I persevered.

But the enemy persisted.  He continued to try to convince us that this was never going to happen.  I wondered if perhaps I was "doing" something wrong, or if I needed to "do" something different.  My patience was running out, along with my confidence.

Then, last Friday, I received a text from a beloved friend who informed me that the Lord had graciously provided a vehicle for our family.

Seriously.


The vehicle didn't come from this friend- she was merely the messenger.

In spite of fears, doubts, frustrations, and pride, God showed up.


My mind tried to make sense of it all.  I tried to figure out how it had worked out- whether or not I had done something to earn this.

And I could think of nothing.

And then I could come up with no logical explanation for this beautiful, perfect, amazing gift... so I praised God.  During this season, He grew our faith, and taught us how to wait on Him.

People keep asking "what did you DO to earn that?!??!"  Truthfully?  We didn't "DO" anything.  We didn't earn this, or even deserve it.  To my knowledge, God doesn't work like that.  We didn't pray the right prayers, or impress the right people.  We just...  prayed and waited.

I have no idea why God chooses to answer some requests and not others.  I may never fully understand the magnificent scope of His awesome plan.  I mean, we prayed for some pretty incredible requests during this same time period, and they were not answered in the way we thought they should be...  if they were answered at all.  But we had to choose to trust in the goodness and the sovereignty of God.  We had to choose to trust that He moved in HIS time, according to HIS will and HIS purposes, for HIS glory.

Not mine.

And let me clarify- I am not bragging about this- not at all.  Several people have asked that we share the story behind the car, and so here it is.  We aren't favored over other people.  We aren't "more precious" to Him or "more loved" by Him.  We just continue to ask Him and wait with hopeful expectation for Him to respond either by providing or by leading us down a different path.

That's it.

No magic formula.  No special words or sign up sheets.

Just a family choosing to trust God rather than manipulating our circumstances to make us more "comfortable".

So, I'm sorry if it's not the super-exciting story you were hoping for.  For us, it was beyond exciting- it was an opportunity to experience God's love in a way we so desperately needed it.

It was our Christmas Miracle.

So we would like to take a moment to thank all of our friends who prayed for us during this season.   I don't know if you've been praying for something and it hasn't worked out the way you had hoped.  Maybe it's been years and you have yet to see any kind of answers.  I encourage you to keep on praying.  If I had things my way, I would have had this prayer answered a year ago. But God isn't a magic genie, so I know He isn't going to move in my timeline or the way I think He should.  I have a friend who prayed for the salvation of her husband for thirteen years before he finally made the decision to trust Christ.

Thirteen years.

God had a plan and it changed (and I would imagine is still changing) countless lives.  It changed my life, for sure!

He's God.  He's in control.  And our job is to trust him, no matter what.

End of story.

So anyway, thanks for reading and for celebrating with us!

To God be the glory, for the things He has done!

   

Leftovers

Raise your hands if you are still eating leftovers... from Thanksgiving.  Anybody?  

I'm not a huge fan of leftovers.  I know I'm not alone in this- they just don't taste the same... except pie.  Pie is never not good, and I can neither confirm nor deny the presence of pie in my home post-Thanksgiving.  But I digress.  When it comes to leftovers there are some things that are merely "okay" the next day.  For the most part, however, leftovers are dominantly for the kids- and the jolly green giant I married.  

So, as I was re-heating some left overs for lunch, Jacob reminded me that he is also not a fan of leftovers when he whined:  "Maaaahhhhhmmmm...  it doesn't taste the same!"  

I'm not sure why this struck me, but it did.  I started thinking about how much of me I'm giving to the Lord, and how much I'm using on other less-important things.

I know- not where you thought I was going with that... 

So, of course, because this is a recurring theme in my life, as of late, I experience this lesson everywhere.  I read this today in my daily devotion (Jesus Calling) and experienced a similar lesson in a meeting I attended this morning:

And I was convicted.

Especially when she writes: "This practice enables them to give Me money, time, and work without yielding  up to Me what I desire most- their hearts...  the habit forming rules provide a false sense of security, lulling the soul into a comatose condition."  And then she goes on to say "What I search for in My children is an awakened soul that thrills to the joy of my presence!"  (The tears started there) and then I read "I created mankind to glorify Me and enjoy Me forever."

A thousand thoughts, I had.  But just one stood out significantly above the rest.  

It was this- how much of my time, money, efforts in ministry, efforts in life do I offer up to God to appease Him without every fully allowing myself to be open to truly loving and receiving love from Him?  I mean, seriously- when is the last time my soul felt awakened and thrilled at the joy of His presence?  These habits that I have trained myself to do, are they really for God, or are they to make me feel better?

The part of me that I yield trying to "spend time with God"- if I'm being truly honest, that's really just the leftovers.  

Read this:


^{Deuteronomy 6
4} “Listen, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord alone. ⁵ And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. ⁶ And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. ⁷ Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. ⁸ Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. ⁹ Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."

Looking back at my week filled with "to-do"s and busyness, I think, I certainly haven't been loving Him with all of my heart, soul, mind, and strength.  I've been loving my church, my kids, my husband, and my home, but not God.  At least, not in this way.  

We are being urged in Deuteronomy to commit ourselves whole-heartedly to this, not just to give God our leftovers.

Psalm 16:11 says:

"You will show me the way of life,

    granting me the joy of your presence
    and the pleasures of living with you forever."

I have often wondered why I spent so much time trying to "do" more in ministry, trying to gain acceptance, approval, and validation from people when God spells it out multiple times in scripture:  We aren't here for our glory, for our ministry, or even for the church as a whole.  We aren't here for our families.  We are here for God-  To know Him and to love Him... and to be loved by Him.  All of that other stuff is just "stuff" unless it becomes the byproduct of loving Him and allowing Him to love others through you.

Maybe you aren't in this same place.  Maybe you "got it" a long time ago and have been enjoying the "joy of His presence" ever since.  For me, I know I've been in a season of change, wrestling with my plans versus God's plans.  Some days I'm uber-focused and really in an attitude of loving Him- not just what He can do.  Those days, I know for certain I experience the joys of His presence and my love for Him grows exponentially.  But old habits die hard.  

I think that because of my past and my personality, I am wired to "do" and to "go" and often lose sight of just being with Him.  I listen to the lie that I have to" do" or to be involved to earn His love, as we often experience with man and I forget that "He so loved the world..."  It was a free gift.  He already loved me- before I ever did anything good or bad.  And yet, I can still see that I'm either trying to please Him or find some sort of fulfillment in status or in other things- even honorable things like ministry, a happy husband, well-educated and well-behaved children, a healthy diet,  a clean home, etc...  I spend far too much time allowing my self to become far too distracted by life in this world and the need for man's approval to concern myself with things like the joy of His presence.  I'm loving "things" and people with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength.  So it's no wonder that when all is said and done, I'm completely and totally exhausted and all I have to offer Him is...  you guessed it- my leftovers.

But I don't want to live like that.  So for today, I'm thankful for this little reminder in the form of a whiny toddler- that helped me to regain my focus.  I am reminded that God doesn't want our leftovers any more than we want His.  He wants our soul-awakened to the thrills and joys of His presence!  So I say we throw out the leftovers and start fresh.

Here's to pie!  (I'm kidding...  sort of).  Here's also to another opportunity to learn more about this incredible opportunity that we all have to be wildly loved by the creator of the universe!

Still learning.  Still growing. 

Still long-winded... 


The Real Life Mom

A Word on The Election

So, the polls are in and we have a winner.  I imagine a collective sigh came over many in the South (and according to the popular vote, much of the rest of the nation) as the news was broadcast.  Immediately people took to Facebook and all of their social media outlets to vent their frustrations.  Friends began fighting as hatred poured from their keyboards like fire from a dragon's mouth.  I saw best friendships turned upside down in an effort to maintain political footing and to be.... right?  The only problem is- we all went to bed yesterday and we all woke up today... and nothing changed.   President Obama is still the President.  And, newsflash- he will be for the next four years.  All of the political rants and fighting did nothing to change that.  All of the crude jokes and rude humor did nothing except prove to non-believers that we, "Christians" are, in reality, a bunch of prideful, arrogant "haters".   And so now, what about those friendships?  Those who were excited about Obama's re-election still woke up excited.  And those who went to bed angry likely woke up with a hatred hangover- mad at the world for making them stay up too late to wait on results, and mad at their fren-emies who should have sided with them... right? Either outcome would have yielded a passionate response, but what I saw last night was beyond passionate- it was pride, riding the glory train.  It was fear, manifested in anger and bitterness, and it was jealousy flying across the computer screens faster than I could have typed it (and I'm pretty fast, just FYI).   I found myself caught up in the mix- accidentally posting one opinion.  Then while trying to avoid political posts,  I turned to scripture, hoping to find a little truth on what God has to say about the matter.   Here is one of the first verses I stumbled across: "The purpose of my instruction is that all believers would be filled with love that comes from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and genuine faith. But some people have missed this whole point. They have turned away from these things and spend their time in meaningless discussions..." 1 Timothy 1 And this one: "He controls the course of the world events; He removes kings & sets up other kings. He gives wisdom to the wise & knowledge to the scholars" Daniel 2:21 And this one was my favorite: 1 Timothy 2: "I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them. 2 Pray this way for kings and all who are in authority so that we can live peaceful and quiet lives marked by godliness and dignity." But the most influential thing I read about the election didn't come across as a Facebook Status. And while the scriptures I found were extremely convicting and challenging, this one thing absolutely spoke truth and inspired me- so, of course, I'm sharing it here.  Please take a moment to read this.  It's a message from my pastor who is, perhaps, one of the wisest men I know.   Thanks for reading!   The Real Life Mom (For more information on Pastor Jeff Wells, or on the church I call home, please visit www.woodsedge.org) Pastor Jeff Wells, on the election: Dear WoodsEdge Family, The overwhelming majority of people in our community, and the overwhelming majority of our congregation, are disappointed, deeply, by the results of the Presidential Election last night. How should we as Christ-followers process this frustration? Here are a few thoughts: 1.  We are unshaken because God is unshaken. The real King does not reside in Washington. He does not work on Capitol Hill. In fact, he is not of this world. The real King is the crucified and risen Savior, the King of kings and Lord of lords, the eternal Word made flesh, who is coming again, not on a donkey or on an elephant, but on a white horse. He is not worried. 2.  Government is important but not all-important. Yes, we are responsible to vote and pray, to be salt and light in our culture. We are called to stand against evil and injustice. Important issues are at stake. We agree with Edmund Burke: "All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." That said, we also realize that the ultimate answers are not political or economic, educational or legislative. They are spiritual. They are found in Jesus Christ alone. Nothing short of widespread revival will turn our country around. We need a fresh movement of the Spirit on our land. I remind you: We have had evangelical Presidents before (which Mitt Romney is not). Men such as Jimmy Carter, Ronald Reagan, George Bush. And yet we still have lots of abortions, enormous debt, overwhelming problems. The U.S. President has power but the power is limited. Only the power of God will bring a breakthrough. 3.  Do not let disappointment become anger or bitterness. Jesus opposed injustice and evil, because he hated sin. But he loved sinners. Sinners of all stripes and flavors. Our problem: We love sin and hate sinners. We hate (though we may not use this word) people who believe differently than we do. Yet we are called to love. To love all people, even our enemies. In fact, if we don't have love, we have nothing at all (1 Corinthians 13:1-3). May it no longer be that Christ-followers in the U.S. are known as self-righteous, condescending and judgmental. May we be known for our hearts of love! May we be known for our humble, grateful, joyful love. 4.  See the big picture. During World War II, C.S. Lewis pointed out that there was a benefit to war: People are more likely to think about death and their need for God. That is true of a society in disarray and rebellion. We don't want such a society. But that's what we have and the advantage to it is that we'll be less likely to rely upon ourselves and our government, and more likely to recognize our desperate need for God. A land in sin and rebellion is a land in many ways more ripe for revival. After all, the Roman government of the first century, and the Chinese government of the 20th century, were even more rebellious, more hostile to God, than our own government today. And both of these countries, ancient Rome and modern China, saw widespread revival. "The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church." We don't want persecution. But there are worse things. 5.  Pray for your President. The Bible is clear: "First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way" (1 Timothy 2:1-2). As Christians, our basic governmental responsibility is to pray for our leaders, good or bad. After all, when Paul wrote this, who was king? It was Nero, a man who would later have Paul beheaded. Church, you may be greatly disappointed. That's OK. But do not be shaken. We've seen the end of the story: Jesus Christ wins! Take joy! Trust the Lord! Pursue him, and your neighbor, with grateful love! With much love, Jeff

Trash Day

Yesterday was trash day.  I couldn't wait for trash day because the week before, we'd completely missed both trash days (a clear sign of mom-brain).  My garage had become so smelly that I didn't even want to open the door anymore for fear it would contaminate the air in my house.

So before heading out the door to Bible Study, I made sure to take the trash to the curb.  By the time I got home, our trashcans had been emptied (smell and all).  

While at the church, I had a conversation with a friend about our "junk"- the things in our lives that we are holding on to and I related it to the trash I'd forgotten to take care of last week.

Sometimes, we don't realize that we haven't gotten all of the trash to the curb.  Maybe a small trashcan got missed somewhere in one of the bathrooms.  Over time, that trashcan will start to smell and can really create some issues for the rest of the house.  

When you finally track down the smell, not only do you usually have to take out the bag, but by then it's usually time to scrub the entire trashcan.  

The same is true for our lives.  Sometimes we bring out all of our junk .  We bring it all to the big trashcan, and we think the work is done.  We've talked about it.  We've "processed" it.  It's done, right?  

Wrong.

I deal with some pretty tough stuff sometimes.  Some of my friends are dealing with stuff that makes my "trash" look like daisies.  Never-the-less, my trash is my trash.  If I carry it around, it causes a foul odor in my life.

But if I (occasionally with the help of family and friends) "take out the trash", I don't have to bear that burden any more.  If I take it to the bigger trash can- if I start working through some of it, but I don't ever take that bigger dumpster to the curb, it's not really gone.  I've just begun working through it. 

But when I take it to the curb, (when I surrender,) I leave it there.  Why?  Because we've learned from experience that when we leave the trash on the curb, the trash guys will come and pick it up.

So I wonder- how many times have I carried my trash to the curb and then dragged it back inside my garage- maggots and all?  

There is a God out there who wants to free me from these struggles- from this junk.  He wants to take these burdens off of my shoulders.  He says if I "put it on the curb" and leave it there for Him, He will be faithful to bring me peace and healing- He'll give forgiveness where necessary and I'll finally be able to sit in my own home and... just breathe- without the stench of my past hurts, regrets, fears, disappointments, and sins lingering in the air.  

So I share all of that to say this-

It's trash day, folks...

"Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you."

1 Peter 5:7

Puzzles and Boogers and Bears, Oh My!

So I was watching Jacob work on a puzzle the other day.  He's four and typically does well with puzzles.  This puzzle, however, was a little more difficult than his normal "toddler" puzzles.  

Have you ever watched a child try to do a puzzle without help?  


It's precious, I know.  

(Sidenote- no, that is not my child.  To my knowledge, I actually have no asian children.  Maybe one day I'll adopt...)

But I really like this picture.  It's an accurate portrayal of one of my children working with a puzzle.  You see, her face is filled with joy, or surprise or...

Actually, I'm not sure what the look on her face is supposed to be.  But she's cute.  End of rabbit trail.

Here is a more accurate portrayal of one of my children working on a puzzle:

He's not mine either but I'd adopt either of them in a heartbeat- boogers and all.  





I digress.




So as I was watching Jacob work on this puzzle, a certain image came to mind.  I thought about how many times I've carried around this giant puzzle piece in my life.  I've tried to manipulate the puzzle and force this piece in to the place where I'm certain it belongs.  I keep pushing and pushing, moving it around, turning it over, and still... it won't fit.

When I watch Jacob, occasionally I'll offer some assistance.  Most of the time he refuses because he really feels a sense of pride in his accomplishment when he is able to complete the puzzle on his own.  

Don't we all?

This particular time, I said to him, "Jacob, Mommy can help you with that piece.  I've got the picture right here, so I know what it's supposed to look like."  He scowled.  He was turning in to a bear.  I knew he was getting frustrated with the puzzle so I insisted, "Why don't you let mommy help you?"  

Jacob protested.  His toddler pride was wounded.  He insisted that he knew how to do it.   So I watched him pick his nose and wrestle a little more with that particular piece before finally conceding, "Mommy, can you please help me with this puzzle?"

At his request, I gladly took that piece from his hand (trading him for a tissue) and showed him a couple of other pieces that needed to be put in place before his troublesome piece would work.  

Once he let me help him with the puzzle, I didn't shame him for trying to get through it on his own.  I didn't make him feel bad about not wanting my help. Instead, I helped him by gently guiding each of the remaining pieces in to place... after which, we had a long talk about personal hygiene.  I'm kidding... sort of.  :)  

So, to my self, I thought again about this puzzle piece (these pieces) that I've been trying to fit in to my own "puzzle".  I realized that in many ways, I can still be like a toddler.  


And then I am reminded of Proverbs 3:5-6 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart.  Don't lean on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path."  

It's like turning to the one who made the puzzle and allowing Him to show you where each piece goes.  You may pick up a piece and try to put it in the puzzle, and He may take that piece away from you so he can set it on the sidelines until you are ready for it.  Sometimes other pieces need to be put in to place first, or the rest of the pieces won't fit the way they are supposed to. 

  

God is the "puzzle-maker".  He is the one who designed me, who mapped out this beautiful "puzzle" of my life.  He has a plan and it's so much more perfect than any plan I could make for myself.  He sees the bigger picture and I can only seem to focus on this big piece in front of me.  

So... I have control issues.   I wonder what other pieces I'm still trying to hold on to... 

(like maybe this analogy?)

What about you?